Proposed Alternative Language by Category
There are two ways in which to hear “language matters.” “Language matters!” And “Language matters!” At Potentials, we look at both aspects.
We all know the power of language – language can hurt, undermine and shame, and/or it can empower, support and heal. In fact, Potentials dedicates a great deal of time to matters of language – function, etiology and psychological impact – in our coaching education, workshops, and online webinars.
During a recent ICF Level I Coach Training (Foundations), when we scratched the surface of the power of language in coaching, there was immediate interest in a more extended conversation about how language matters. We’ve been working on expanding just such a conversation for a while.
Following a format of “Instead of” and ” Use/Try”, we examine language for the negative impact that it has on the other and offer suggestions for other ways of expressing the same thought/idea in words that do not harm and more accurately describe what is being said.
The specific categories we examine are categorized as: racist, ableist, sexist and militarist. The list is not exhaustive, and we invite you to join us as we seek to make our language more empowering to others in ways conscious and unconscious.
Here’s what we have so far:
Non – Violent/Military-Based
| INSTEAD OF | TRY/USE |
| Pull the trigger | Get started, launch |
| Take a stab at it | Give it a try, try it |
| Jump the gun | Start too soon |
| Bite the bullet | Get started, stop delaying |
| Deadline | Due date |
| Pick your/our battles | Decide what things are most important |
| Shoot me (an email) | Send me (quickly) |
| Overkill | Excessive, more than necessary |
| I bombed | I/my presentation was not well-received |
| Roll with the punches | Be flexible/nimble and move forward |
| Soften the blow | Make something easier; mitigate losses or challenges |
| Shot in the dark | Wild guess |
| Beat a dead horse | Continue to focus on/discuss something we have already discussed or resolved |
| Blown away | In awe, tremendously impressed |
| Kicking around | Thinking through, considering angles, wondering |
| Straight shooter | Direct, candid, honest |
| Bullet points | Talking points, main ideas, key points |
| Trigger (ed) | Reminded, remembered, experienced (something negative) |
| Long shot | A risk |
| Kill the bill or idea | Vote against or the opposition won |
| Target | Focus on, turn attention toward |
| Give it a shot | Try, make an attempt |
| Moving target | Changing goals |
| Rally the troops | Encourage, support, inspire, gather the group |
| Silver bullet | Solution |
| I’m shooting for/aiming for | My goal is |
| Hardest hit | Most (negatively) impacted |
| Bootcamp | Intensive training, education |
| Hit the target | Meet or achieve a stated goal |
| Armed with the facts | Knowledgeable, well researched |
| Lead the charge | Leading the team/initiative, research |
| Killed it, Knocked it out of the park | Did really well, exceeding expectations |
| Had a blast | Had a good time |
| Send out a blast | Send an email to “all” |
| On (my/your) radar | Keeping track of, noticing, aware of |
| In the trenches | The ones doing the work in question |
| Boots on the ground | People onsite and systemically connected |
| Good Lord willing and “the crick” don’t rise | We sure do hope so |
Racially Offensive
| INSTEAD OF | TRY/USE |
| Pot calling the kettle black | Not sure which one is worse, equally as guilty |
| White noise machine | Ambient noise machine |
| Jimmies | Sprinkles |
| Gypped | Cheated |
| Blackball, black mark | Vote against; implies wrongdoing |
| Master bedroom | Primary bedroom |
| Master | Gain/prove expertise; primary/replica (tech) |
| Blacklist | Vote against, veto, prohibit |
| Peanut gallery | Less expensive seats |
| Grandfathered | Exempt from following (a new) rule |
| Grandfathering | Making an exception to a new rule |
| Cake walk | Easy |
| Lynch mob | Unjust attack; unfairly indited or blamed |
| Uppity | Arrogant |
| Sold down the river | Betrayed (devastating) |
| Spirit – animal | Affinity for, inclination towards |
| First-world problem | Privileged |
| Spooky | Scary, frightening, eerie |
| Blackmail, blacklist, black sheep | Extortion, denied membership/entry, outcast |
| Ghetto | Neighborhood |
| Tribe | People to whom I relate well, deeply |
| Lowest on the totem pole | Less important, marginalized |
| Savage | Fierce, cruel |
| Brainstorm | Had a “brilliant” or intriguing thought; generating said thoughts |
| Master plan | Starting plan, plan, plans, template |
Sexist Language
| INSTEAD OF | TRY/USE |
| Congressman | Member of Congress, Legislator |
| Maiden Name | Family name, surname at birth |
| Guys | Folks, people, you all, y’all |
| Seminal | New & gaining traction, generating new ideas |
| Girl | Woman |
| Grandfathering | Making an exception to a new rule |
| Mankind | People, humanity, humankind |
| Manpower | Employees, staff |
| “Man” the table/station | Staff, run, operate, populate |
| Fireman | Firefighter |
| Policeman | Police officer |
| Postman | Postal carrier/worker |
| Chairman/Chairwoman | Chair |
| Disseminate | Distribute |
Ableist Language
| INSTEAD OF | TRY/USE |
| Virtual | Online (unless it involves avatars and alternative universes) |
| Disabled or differently abled | Person with a disability |
| Diabetic (or other health condition) | Person with diabetes |
| Victim | Survivor |
| Suffering from | Experiencing, living with |
| Blind-sided | Did not anticipate that |
| Blind-spot | Was not aware, could not see |
| Dumb | Could not/unable to speak |
| Lame | Uninteresting, boring |
| Tone deaf | Does hot hear/listen well |
| Crippled | Unable to move, paralyzed |
This is a work in progress. We invite you to join us in contributing to this list as we seek to improve the quality and presence of coaching language and the doors to possibility it can open. Please feel free to contact us with additional information at [email protected]. We will continue to expand this list as we learn more.
